You're like rain Cold and Emotionless
by AlmondArlert
Summary: When L leaves Wammy's and leaves B behind, it causes all sorts of misfortune. No matter how different they are from each other, there was always something which bound them together. "You're like the rain. Cold and Emotionless..." BBxL
1. Everything Ends, No Matter How Sweet

**Chapter 1**

_**Everything Ends, no matter how Sweet**_

**A/N: **Basically, I haven't been writing anything for AGES! Sorry guys D:

I'm getting to writing the last chapter for Five Days of Hell but it's taking a hell of a long time since I have writers block (Again!) and High School in less than a week. I can't write anything in the next three days either, one cause it's my birthday party tomorrow, then it's my actually birthday the next day then on top of that I'm being forced to go to the movies with my friend to watch Yogi Bear or something.

Anyway, sorry this is sooo short but don't worry, it's going to have a lot more chapters to it!

I might not be able to actually post anything more for a few days but I'll try my hardest to get something up on Sunday before High School! Gack!

**L's POV:**

It was all an epic battle for justice really; we both had a really honestly good shot of winning.

That is until he stepped on my foot and caused me to flinch and blink.

"You blinked! I win!" The raven haired boy exclaimed, chuckling to himself.

"You cheated!" I yelped, rubbing my poor foot.

"No I didn't, you just can't take pain like I can" He shot back, his crimson red eyes burning a hole through my skull.

The entire room was shrouded in darkness; it was around one in the morning. It was only a small room really, there was creamy white carpet covering every inch of the floor except in the kitchen. At the moment, we were in the bedroom which consisted of bunk beds, a wardrobe and a whole heap of empty jars which were most likely once filled with strawberry jam.

I stretched my arms high into the air, yawning with my eyes closed.

I could hear him laughing again; it wasn't a mocking laugh, but more of a humorous giggle.

"You seriously aren't tried, are you?" The teenage boy seated in front of my asked.

"Course I'm not tired…" I mumbled, crossing my legs and placing my hands on the ground behind me so I could lean back without falling.

"Heh heh, you so are!" He snickered, smirking lightly.

"I'm not tired!" I yelped in defence.

"No matter, cause I can wake you up!" He shrieked then pounced on me, knocking me down onto my back.

Yep, this was my life and I loved it. Everything at Wammy's was sort of dull and depressing until _he _came along. I never really questioned him about his eyes, they did fascinate me though. His scarlet red eyes; they were like liquid pools of jam. Strawberry Jam.

I couldn't imagine living in a world without him. He was the reason I was actually happy, he changed my life and just his smile made my heart beat faster.

But then everything changed.

We grew apart, each leading different lives.

I was a famous detective and he became a mass murdering serial killer.

I couldn't help but miss him.

My Beyond Birthday…

**Beyond Birthday's POV:**

The rain poured down, pelting against me. I sauntered down the street, shaking slightly from the cold. Why did this all have to happen?

It had been seven years since I saw _him_. I couldn't help but remember his laughter, his smile. The way he always looked at me through those big panda eyes.

I had blood on my hands, who had I killed now? I don't know. All I know is that I enjoyed it, their screams, the smell of their blood, hearing their skin being torn apart. Why had I become this? It was because he left me, I know it…

I had no idea where I was, where I was going. Running, still running away from the memories. Memories of _him_. Every inch of me was completely soaked now. The only way you could honestly see me was the glowing red of my eyes. Funny, he always used to say my eyes made me unique. Well, he was right. I'm unique. I'm just too unique that no one will even dare come near me.

I can still remember when he left…It hurt.

**~Flash Back~**

"Beyond…I have to go" He told me sternly.

"Wh-What! Where!" I yelped, shock covering my face.

"Roger says I have potential to be better, to be the best." He stated obviously.

His face showed no emotion. He was just like a painting in a way, always keeping a straight face.

"B-But you can't leave!" I yelled at him, tears welling in my eyes.

"You're all I have" I continued, the tears spilling over stinging my cheeks.

"I don't have a choice. Good Bye, Beyond Birthday" With that, he walked to the door, opened it and walked out closing it tightly behind him.

I broke down. My legs gave out and I fell hard against the floor silently crying. Crying for _him_. How could he do this to me?

**~End of Flash Back~**

I stumbled and fell hard against the gravel of the road. It scraped at my legs and tore at the skin violently, blood appearing from the cuts and being stung harshly by the rain.

Why did he leave me?

My vision began to blur. I hadn't cried since that one time he left me. It hurts…

I gasped as I felt the salt water droplets roll down my face and over my lips. How is it that he can still do this to me without even being present?

Damn you, L. Lawliet.

So, was it bad? Good? Should I just discontinue it? Give me feedback people!

^^ Everyone who favourites get's a Lawlipop and everyone who reviews get's a MarshMELLO!


	2. Glancing Disturbance

**Chapter 2**

_**Glancing Disturbance**_

**Beyond Birthday's POV:**

The light hurt my eyes. Last night I had rented a small hotel room. Yes, for once I actually felt like sleeping. The room was really just a bed and wooden floors. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up. My head was spinning and I felt nauseas. Everything from before, from my past, was all flooding back at once. Those painful memories I tried all my life to suppress. If you had cried for the first time in seven years the night before, you'd know what I'm feeling right now. Yeah, it's pretty much depression. I could slit my wrists if I wanted, but that wouldn't help at all…

Despite everything, I wanted to see L again. My lips twitched and curved up slightly at the thought of his eyes, his panda eyes that used to glow with such emotion, his eyes that now are only emotionless pools of liquid night.

In a way he was like the rain, both cold and emotionless. Just their touch makes you shiver.

I hated the fact he could control me just like a puppet without being here. In a way though, I want him to control me. I want him to need me. I want him to not be able to live without me. Like before how he counted on just my very presence to get through the day. I want to go back to when he cared for me, when he was my best friend.

L. Lawliet, where are you?

I was walking through the sweets store now; scanning every one of the isles in search for jam.

If anything, you'd think these morons would at least stock a few measly jars of strawberry jam.

I tilted my head and glanced out from the store, one particular person caught my eye. He had dark blackish grey hair and dark raven eyes. He would have stood at about five foot eight inches if he wasn't so hunched over. One hand was lifted up to his mouth where his thumb rested on his lip, rubbing back and forth gently. His skin was pale so the dark circles under his eyes were quite noticeable, even from a distance. His figure looked small and frail but I'm guessing he probably is fairly strong behind the disguise. In a way, he looked much like me. Sept my hair was slightly straighter, my eyes are red and I don't slouch that much. Before I had even registered I was moving, I was already half way toward the man within the crowd. I wasn't entirely sure why, but he drew me to him. I had to see his face closer. Everything about him was so familiar.

I had finally pushed through the crowd and was standing just behind said man. I cleared my throat.

"Uh…Hello" I mumbled towards his back, he turned around to face me once he heard my voice.

He stared at me for a few moments before even thinking about saying anything.

"Beyond Birthday?" He asked all though it sounded more like a statement then and actually question.

"Yes…" I replied, my voice a little shaky. Was this…Who I thought it was…?

He smiled at me. Looking up (He would be one or two inches taller than me if he wasn't so slouched over) at my face he reached one hand out and cupped my left cheek with it.

"I missed your eyes" He stated bluntly. He missed my eyes? What kind of line is that!

I couldn't really say anything back. Not now that I knew it was L. This just wasn't normal. I never thought we'd meet in a place like this. The crowd was mostly just adults and children as there had been a small shadow puppet show in the centre of the town. I wasn't interested in it though, more in buying my strawberry jam although my interest has been directed towards L, for now…

"It has been so very long since I have seen you, Beyond" L continued, his eyes unlike before, showed slight emotion. It was a cross between sadness and hope.

All I could manage to do was nod.

My face started to heat up as the panda eyed man moved closer. I could feel his breath lightly on my face.

"Come with me." He grabbed my hand and pulled me off in a direction leading away from the crowd of people.

When we finally stopped, I was a little out of breath. He'd dragged me half way across town and into a hotel building. We were now in the lift heading up to L's room. The fact that his room number was 1313 was kind of humorous, if you connected the 1 with the 3 the letter you'd configure would be B, and BB is my initials. I smirked at the sudden thought. It was not very likely that he actually knew that his room was my initials, it was just a really strange coincidence.

"Beyond? Beyond this is my floor, you need to get off the elevator." L's voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I'd obviously been standing in the elevator like an idiot.

I walked off the elevator feeling kind of stupid. It was obvious that my face was slightly flushed.

L walked down the hall and I followed him. He stopped at one of the far doors, on it was the number 1313. Slowly, L pulled out a multicoloured key from his pocket and swung open the door.

The room was poorly lit. Dark red curtains were draped over the windows and in the main room there was only a love seat and a small television. If this hotel room had a bedroom, I'm guessing it wasn't used all that much.

I followed L into the room. He then crouched on the couch. I have to admit, I used to sit like that knowing L had also sat like that. Of course I don't exactly sit like that anymore. I stepped inside the room and closed the door slowly behind me. Not knowing exactly what to say, I just stood quietly by the door.

"Please, sit" He motioned to the spot next to him then proceeded to place his thumb against his lip.

Obeying his command, I walked over and sat down next to him on the creamy white sofa and brought one my legs up to my chest, wrapping my arm around it.

It was an awkward silence for a few moments before I just blurted out something at random.

"Why did you leave? Where have you been? Why didn't you come back?" I spoke a little fast but it was possible to understand…I hope.

He circled his thumb around his lip as his eyes darted towards me.

"I left as I had a case to attend to. I've been in Japan and I didn't come back because a lot more cases came up and I had not the time nor the reason to return to Wammy's." L stated bluntly.

I grit my teeth at the last part. How could he say that? It hurt, like a machete ripping up my chest.

"What about me? Wasn't I a good enough reason to come back…" I tilted my head down to hide the slight hint of sadness in my eyes.

"Like I said before, I simply had a lot of cases to deal with as world's greatest detective."

"Why the hell didn't you come to A's Funeral!" Anger was prominent in my voice now.

"I do not have an answer to that question" He told me.

He really doesn't care…My eyes stung from the tears which were now streaming down my face. Serial Killers are not meant to feel. Not meant to cry. What's wrong with me?

My entire body was shaking as the tears increased.

"B…" L's voice was softer now; he sounded a little worried, though it was hard to tell from his emotionless state.

I didn't answer him and only sat in silence trying to stop the liquid from spilling from my crimson eyes.

"B…" He repeated, slightly louder this time.

Still, I didn't respond nor look up. He couldn't see me cry. Not now, not ever.

My eyes widened as I felt two cool, slim arms wrap themselves around me and pull me against a smooth chest. One hand moved up to the back of my head and stroked my hair gently, the other still wrapped tightly around my waist.

"I am truly sorry, B" L apologized. His voice was sincere and coated in sadness and shame.

Perhaps he still cared. Maybe I was wrong…Everything hurts. My eyes slowly drifted closed, the tears still painting my face and sliding along my neck. I suspected L's shirt would be getting wet, or was already wet. For the time being though, I do not care, I just want to sit here. Silent, I just want to feel him close to me. If only the world could just freeze like this. This moment, couldn't be more tormentingly perfect…


	3. Gomenasai ne

**A/N: I'm so terribly sorry about the massive wait for this next chapter!**

**You see, where I live (Australia) there was a huge category 5 cyclone. We've had no power for DAYS, and we STILL don't have power.**

**At the moment though, I'm at my Aunties home as she has power. So you can be expecting the next chapter hopefully soon.**

**I've actually been really sick for the past week or so and still am recovering from it so that's also delayed my writing. My parents and my grandma are also quite sick so if anything goes wrong there, there'll be an even larger delay.**

**Like I said before, I'm truly sorry about this inconvenience and I hope you guys weren't too upset waiting for my next chapter.**

**Thank you for reading. **

**~Rin.**


	4. Insanity and Intoxication

**Chapter 3**

_**Insanity and Intoxication**_

There was nothing but darkness. It was like some kind of pitched black room with no walls. My mind was clouded with images of people screaming, most of them were children. There was something blazing behind their eyes which looked like a burning fire. It hit me then, it was in fact, Whammys. That was a long time ago though, when the place was set on fire with an aerosol can and a cheap lighter. How I know this is because I was the one to run around the place with my so called 'Flame Thrower' screaming that we all deserved to bloody die. Roger caught me out on that and it really didn't end well…

At that time, I was only young and L had just left Whammys. That's about the time I snapped and lost it completely. I can't say I've gotten any better, if anything, I've gotten much, much worse.

I was snatched from my thoughts when the black room began to spin. Well, either it was spinning or my head was. Not literally spinning around in circles. You know what I mean.

I couldn't see the fire anymore, just the darkness, haunting me.

My crimson eyes flashed open only to see a white ceiling and a fan moving slowly, the air was pushing my hair over my face gently.

What the hell?

I was in a bedroom laying under the covers in a large bed.

I rolled over, this lead to my head lolling over the side of the bed. My eyes travelled around the room which was still dark so all you could really see was just vague shapes and blurred images. My eyes then drifted over a sort of hunched over figure holding a spoon and a plate with what looked like some kind of cake on it. The way he was perched on the small arm chair was plain abnormal yet seemed to fit him in a way. It matched his abnormality in its own personal way, strange.

The piercing silence was absolutely killing me. I watched as he took spoonfuls of his cake and slowly put them into his mouth until the entire slice had vanished completely. He stared right at me, his onyx eyes boring into my soul. I watched as the tantalizing man rose slowly from his position on the plush chair. His slouching standing figure was thin and seemingly frail, most likely easy to break. The blood in his veins prominent within his paled skin, if only that crimson red would cover his body. Images of a bloody L cowering before me shot through my mind, it was almost enough to make me drool. Perhaps his blood tastes as sweet as all the sugar he consumes. L slowly walked out from the room and into the kitchen, most likely in search of more sweets. That's when it hit me, I was just thinking of how horrifyingly beautiful it would be to murder that subtle man. I needed to get out of this place away from L. I clambered to my feet and dashed across the room to the dusty yet slightly darkened window. Reaching out, I pulled it open and slipped out and onto the roof. It wasn't hard to scale down from the floor I was on to the ground and before I knew it I was running down the street in the dim morning light.

When I got far enough away from the hotel, I stopped and leant against the brick wall of a scandalous night club. Inside the night club building you could hear loud music screaming out words that most people would find hard to decipher. Drunken men were practically falling out from the door as it was almost the night club's closing time. They swayed, beer bottle in hand, and stumbled their way down the cobble street in the direction I'd come from.

I took a few deep breaths, letting my coal black hair cover my scarlet eyes. There has got to be more than one thing wrong with me to even think about hurting L. I'm sick; my mind is clouded by lust and hatred. I'm not stupid; I don't need anyone to tell me I have problems. Just as I was about to start walking back to my run down, piece of shit hotel room, a man walked up to me. He seemed a lot older than me, his brown hair having a lot more than a few grey strands amongst it. His clouded blue eyes just proved the fact that he was completely hammered. Wonderful, now I have to deal with a drunken old man.

"H-Hey you! D'ja wonna come tah my pla-a-ace? I can show yuh a good t-time!" The man's words were slurred and practically stuttered towards me.

I just stared at that imbecile before me, why should I even answer this moronic bastard?

"H-Hey! I'm talking to yuh, boy!" He yelped with a few hiccups.

"Go fuck yourself old man" I muttered darkly.

"N-Now why would I do that when I could fuck yuh?" The man laughed and put the beer in his hand to his lips, drinking it slowly.

I stayed silent, this man was more annoying than I expected…

He walked towards me and grabbed onto my shoulder, leaning in as if he were going to kiss me. His breath smelt of cigarettes and alcohol. Before his greasy lips could get any closer, I shoved him hard in the chest and began to walk away. He stumbled backwards from my sudden movement but soon gained his balance again, only to sling his arm roughly around my waist and pull me against him. Now I'm seriously starting to lose it. I slithered out of his grasp and looked at him through crimson eyes. The man hadn't seen my eyes before, and took a wary step back.

"You creep!" He yelled towards me before throwing his beer at me. The alcoholic substance seeped through my hair and stung the cuts down my back, arms and stomach. Honestly, I didn't plan on having to seriously hurt some sick drunken bastard, but now I'm pissed, really seriously pissed.

I walked up behind the man and slipped my hand around his neck, making sure I held onto the pressure points tightly.

"Whaaa?" The man stammered.

"You think you can just waltz around doing whatever you want?" I asked, gravel in my voice.

I dug my nails deep into his throat, his blood slowly rolling over my finger tips and down my hand.

The man coughed a few times and struggled against my hold. I dragged my fingers around to the front of his throat, slitting it with my nails. The corners of his lips leaked scarlet red liquid. He coughed and sputtered from the puncture wounds I'd made in his throat. He fell to the ground slowly so that he was on his hands and knees before me.

A demonic grin spread across my face as I knelt down in front of the man.

"You should really think before throwing your alcohol at people" I hissed as I reached my hand forward and dug my fingers deep into his throat until they appeared out the opposite side. Twisting my hand a little, just to make the blood flow out faster, I leant forward and whispered in his ear.

"You're going to hell"

I left the night club, only to hear shrieks and screams from behind me. I couldn't hold in my devilish cackle as I walked away from the murder scene with my hands buried deep in my pockets. Oh how I love that thick, sweet, crimson red substance which resides within our bodies.

My sanity had completely slipped away by the time I reached my hotel room on the bad side of town. I clicked a few buttons on the stereo until it began blasting out the song 'Strawberry Gashes'. My hands still shon with the scarlet red blood of that elderly man from the night club, it was almost hypnotizing. I reached into one of the bedside drawers and pulled out a silver dagger like object. I needed to see more of that red gushing liquid. Running the dagger slowly across my wrist, I stared as the blood ran down my arm and dripped onto the wooden floor boards. The smell was intoxicating.

Insanity; the pure definition of being broken.

I am insane.

I am broken.

And it's because of you.

But yet…

I find myself obsessed with you.


	5. Scars

**A/N: Holy Kira. GOMENASAI! I'm sorry about the MASSIVE wait for this chapter. I honestly have had it up to my neck in school work and personal problems lately, what with my Panda-chan, school camp, teachers quitting their jobs, assignments, tests and theartre restaurant I really haven't had time to write up anything. I hope you guys can forgive me D;  
I'll try and get the next chapter up by the end of this month, but if I don't, it'll be up ASAP!**

**Now, on another note; (hehe BB novel mentioning :DDD) I am actually in the process of writing yet ANOTHER fanfiction for Death Note. I know how everyone LOVES the MattxMello pairing...I know I do...So I decided to write a long term fic for them ^^  
The idea came to me yesterday afternoon whilst I was being forced to watch 'Romeo + Juliet' the modern movie version of shakespears play. In truth, I wasn't to fond of that movie...But anyhow, I'm going to write a fic called 'Romello + Mattulet' for all those MattxMello fans out there (such as myself XD). The first chapter should be up in this next week :DDDD YAY! Don't worry though, it's not gonna be in that painful old english gibberish shit 'cause that's just...retarded! (no offence to those who may like it...) **

**Anyway, I'm sure you guys wonna start reading now so best I shut the hell up! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or any of the characters...**

* * *

**Chapter 4**

**Scars**

**Beyond Birthday's POV:**

My heart was pounding in my ears, blood staining the white sheets strewn across the small bed.

I lay silently laughing, drugged by the smell of metallic rust. My mind was spinning furiously and the insanity just kept on clawing at my mind. My crimson eyes slowly began to blur as lack of sleep and blood loss began to take a toll on my body. I couldn't pass out now though, if I were to sleep I'm sure I wouldn't wake up again. I hadn't realized I was crying until I felt the warm liquid tears sliding down my face to my neck. Insanity was supposed to numb everything…So why am I not numb. This pain is excruciating. It's not my cuts…It's my chest.

_I need you…_

I-It's not about him! I hate him…He made me do this, he made me become this…

Lawli, you are the reason A is dead. You are the reason I am insane. No, I'm practically dead.

_Come back…_

You left me…I hate you…Leave me alone. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

_Why…?_

Why did you have to come back…Why did you have to act as if you cared…You don't care!

_It hurts…_

Pain courses through my entire body, I can feel my heart clenching with each beat. How can you do this to me? How?

Even if I were to lay here for all of eternity and just let myself bleed to death I'd still have this pain in my blackened heart…

_Life, as if I had one to begin with…_

The voices in my head are more prominent than ever, they are the only voices loud enough to make your ears feel like bleeding….

_It's his fault…_

You left me, you broke me, and you tore out my heart, shredded it into tiny pieces then discarded it just like a toy you became bored of.

_L. Lawliet, I hate you._

**L's POV:**

When I arrived back into my room, I saw nothing, nothing but darkness and the bed sheets tangled around each other on the floor.

I'd had a feeling in the pit of my stomach that he would leave. After everything I had done to that boy…It's amazing he didn't murder me when he had the chance.

The sun was just beginning to rise and the light stung my eyes, damned insomnia.

The window was pulled up so that the wind was flowing in, blowing the cheap white laced curtains.

He jumped!

My feet pattered hard against the floor as I ran towards the window, expecting to see a broken Beyond Birthday crumpled into a bloody heap on the side walk.

When I pulled my head through the open window and saw nothing but pavement, I felt a sigh of relief course through me. Shortly followed though, was a cold shiver. If Beyond was not dead, than…Where was he?

It had been 4 hours since I'd last stopped for a moment to think about what I was doing or where I was going. Nothing made sense other than the unbearable urge to find that scarlet eyed criminal.

I hadn't realized, but I'd walked all the way to the bad side of town and was standing outside of a rundown hotel building. Without thinking, I swung their door open and walked inside. After scoping out the lobby I had gained enough courage to ask the counter clerk whether a certain red eyed killer had checked in recently.

I gave her Beyond's description briefly and she told me in return where his room was located; room 1313, just like mine…Ironic.

Figuring knocking on the door wouldn't do any help, I gripped the door handle and creaked open the door slowly. As soon as the door opened a rusty blood-like smell rushed to meet my nose. I cringed in reply. Once my eyes focused in on the scene, a shocked expression had made its way across my entire figure. The room itself was small, and it looked a lot like an attic. There were blood stains covering the floor, yet there were more recent blotches of crimson liquid over besides the bed. It seemed as if the sheets had already been stained red once before and had only been rained on by yet another coat of strawberry. In the mist of all this horror and destruction lay a battered boy, all cut and bruised, a dagger by his side and blood still gushing from the cuts on his wrists and legs. He seemed lifeless; laying there unmoving and pale, although his chest rose and fell it looked as if he was battling to keep his heart beating. A pained expression was painted to his face, his nose slightly cringed and his eyes squeezed tightly shut. As I walked closer, I realized his raven black shirt was dampened with the same incarnadine colouredsubstance. Slowly, I edged his shirt up only to find multiple scars, healing cuts and freshly carved symbols. Lifting his shirt higher, I saw a pink scar over on the skin above his heart…A pink scar in the shape of an L.

Hypnotized by the horrific scars, I jumped when I felt a cold hand grip around my wrist. I stared down at the bright red eyes of my victim, the boy who's life I had destroyed…piece, by painful piece…

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**Soooo what'd you guys think, eh? Good, bad? **

**PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI REVIEW AND FAVOURITE!**

**Matt: ...Doesn't Kami mean...Paper?**

**Mello: *keels over laughing* For the l-love of-of PAPER! GUAHAHAH!**

**Rin: You douches! *hits them with a shovel* KAMI MEANS GOD _AND _PAPER!**

**Mikami: heh heh heh...sexy god of paaaaa-aa-aaaa-aaaaaper!**

**Rin: *glares* I'm. Gonna. Slaughter. You!**

**Mikami: *Screams* SLAUGHTER HAS THE WORD LAUGHTER IN IT! LET'S LAUGH THIS OUT! *runs into a closet and locks the door***

**Rin: KYAHAHHAHAHAHAH! *is cutting open the closet with an axe***

**Mikami: NOT THAT TYPE OF LAUGHTER! EVIL! EVIL! EVIILLLL! *screams repetitively like Misa***


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